Coming Clean | Big Personal Update + Answering Your Questions

kate spade Embellished CoatInstead of doing the standard new year’s resolutions or lessons learned post I felt like it would be more therapeutic for me to just come clean. The truth is for the past few months I’ve been holding a lot of things close to my heart almost to the point where I feel like I’ve become impersonal.

I started Katie’s Bliss what feels like a lifetime ago– over 6 years! I’ve chronicled everything from graduating college, making the move to New York, getting my first job and my advice for breaking into the public relations industry. I feel like I’ve “grown up” on Katie’s Bliss. I mean, I was only 20 when I started blogging. Now at 26 years old it feels like ages ago when I filmed goofy YouTube makeup tutorials in my college apartment and talked about my dream of moving to a big city. I’m very proud to have accomplished many of the goals I set for myself when I was in college. I’m also proud to have accomplished many things I never imagined or set out to achieve.

2016 was very good to me, but it started off incredibly rocky. Ugh, rocky may even be an understatement. During the first three months of the year I realized I was miserable at my job and began resenting my career, I had a close friendship end very hurtfully, we had our apartment vandalized and many of our belongings destroyed by a cleaning service (you can’t even make up what happened 😥 ) and I lost a significant amount of weight due to stress and anxiety. I could hardly eat and only being able to stay asleep for 3-4 hours every night became my new normal. On the outside I tried my best to act like everything was okay, but on the inside I felt like a zombie and just getting through the day without bursting into tears the second I got home was an accomplishment.

I truly believed 2016 was going to rank as one of the toughest years of my life. There was soooo many times I wanted to just let it all spill out, but my anxiety of being judged held me back from confessing what was happening on my blog or social media. I used to be much more of an open book and it’s hard to pinpoint just when I became I so closed off.

If there’s one resolution I have for 2017 it’s getting back to my roots. I want to keep it real and share what’s really going on in my life. That means the good, and the bad. I want to start giving my advice again and talking about lessons I’ve learned personally and professionally. There are a few topics I want to discuss that deserve their own posts, however to start I think it makes sense to answer some of my most frequently asked personal questions. Deep breath…here we go!

Vineyard Vines Gingham Fit Flare Dress

Are you and Nick EVER going to get engaged?

If only you knew how often we get asked this question. It’s gonna happen people, I swear! For those who are new to my blog, Nick and I have been together a while. We celebrated 7 years in October! We actually lived on the same hall our freshman year of college and began dating during our sophomore. I have to say that after moving to New York and living together for almost four years, we pretty much already feel like we’re married. We’re each other’s best friend and biggest cheerleader. He’s the love of my life and I couldn’t imagine living without him.

We talk very openly about getting engaged and both agree we will probably wait another two years before taking that next step. Why? Well it’s not glamorous, but finances are a reason. The reality is whatever way we decide to get married, we’re going to have to pay for it ourselves and right now that’s not an expense we want to be burdened with. Nick is still working on paying off some massive student debt and I feel no need to add a diamond ring to a list of expenses he is working so hard to reduce. We also both would like more time to focus on progressing in our careers and building our savings. It’s important to us that when we do take that big step we’re in a position where we can really enjoy the experience and not feel like it’s forced.

Are you still working full-time in PR?

Drumroll please… No, I am no longer working full-time in PR. Wow, I feel so relieved finally saying it.

Going into 2016 I had absolutely no plans to quit my job. It wasn’t even a thought that crossed my mind. For four years I had managed to do both: blog and work full-time as a publicist. But around March it became harder and harder to ignore that I wasn’t getting any joy out of my job and I was incredibly unhappy. As in coming home after a 12+ hour day of work and immediatly dissolving into tears unhappy. The future I had envisioned for myself as a publicist didn’t feel like a goal to me anymore and regularly I found myself wondering why I was pursuing my current career path. Slowly but surely everyday turned into a bitter struggle where I was going to bed with a pit of anxiety in my stomach just thinking about having to wake up in the morning to do it all again.

So yes, since the end of April I’ve been working for myself and I can honestly say I have never been happier. The decision to quit my job completely reversed the negative spiral I had found myself in and resulted in me having one of the best and most rewarding years of my life. I think this topic really deserves it’s own post because I know so many of you found me and started following because of my posts on career advice and the public relations industry. I have so much I want to get off my chest and really want to be able to give you a thorough explanation. It may take me some time to write, but I promise it will come.

5 Tips To Grow Your Savings

Any advice for those looking to break into the PR industry?

I get this question often and I strongly recommend checking out this advice video where I talk about breaking into the industry, this post for my tips on landing your dream internship, along with this post where I detail how to stand out when applying for an entry-level job.

How do you make money blogging?

I recently read this article on Independent Fashion Bloggers that I think explains it well. It’s a complicated question to answer because bloggers earn revenue from multiple avenues. Some of the primary ways bloggers make money include advertising, flat fees for sponsored posts and affiliate commission (aka when you buy something after clicking a link on my site I earn a small percentage of your purchase.) I don’t get a bi-weekly paycheck and every month is different. It’s scary not knowing exactly how much I’ll make, but it’s also very motivating to know that there aren’t any limits.

New York City

Do you plan on ever regularly making YouTube videos again?

I have a love/hate relationship with YouTube. For those that haven’t been following me from the beginning, I actually got my start on YouTube! Yes, my old videos are completely cringeworthy, but I had so much fun creating them when I was in college and during my first year in New York.

For a while YouTube was actually my main priority and the blog came second. So what changed? Well, time (or lack thereof) was a big reason. The hours required to put together a blog post doesn’t even compare to how long it takes to film, edit and upload a video. Regularly making videos was tough to keep up with while working full-time, and honestly I was worried about being judged if my coworkers or clients stumbled across my channel.

Eventually I started migrating away from YouTube and over to blogging, which I’ve found I enjoy much more. That said, YouTube will always have a soft spot in my heart. In 2017 I would love to begin easing back into videos again– maybe once a month? I don’t want it to be my primary focus, but I know it’s how so many people first started following me and I think it would be a great way to connect with my newer readers and followers in a more personal way. Any video ideas please let me know!

I want to move to New York but I’m so overwhelmed. Where should I start?

First thing you should do is read this post and check out this video. There’s no exact set of steps to take when moving to New York. You kind of just have to jump in and do it and roll with the setbacks and stress. Nick and I learned a lot during our first year in the city. The little West Village apartment we lived for two and half years and the entry level jobs we took to get our foots in the doors of our respective industries were stepping stones. They weren’t final goals, but each was a learning experience that helped us grow and get closer to the success we both want to achieve individually and as a couple.

You can’t expect everything to go perfectly when making a big life change. Life just doesn’t work that way and I’ve found that you can’t dwell on what could have been or what you should’ve done differently. I’ve never loved living in New York as much as I do today, and I know that I wouldn’t appreciate my life in the same way if I hadn’t experienced our mice-infested first apartment or taken that first job as an underpaid PR assistant.

Katie's Bliss Apartment

How did you find your apartment?

I talk about this more in-depth in this post here. But to give you a quick summary, I found our current place by making a list of all the major management companies that own apartment buildings in the areas we were interested in living and then reaching out to their leasing office. This allowed us to skip using a broker and avoid having to pay an extra fee for having someone else find our place.

When looking for our first apartment we had no idea what we were doing and took the first thing we found on Craigslist. Looking back we should have narrowed our search to no-fee apartments only (aka ones not listed through a broker), but we were in a time crunch and needed somewhere to live.

I’m coming to New York! Do you have any recommendations about what do and where to eat?

I have so many recommendations! All my favorite spots and things I suggest doing can be found in my New York City Guide. If you have any other questions definitely feel free to tweet me or leave me a comment on Instagram!

So what’s next?

Well for one thing I already feel like a huge weight has been lifted off my shoulders. For so long I debated if I should even reveal some of the personal things that happened in my life in 2016, but now that I’ve actually done it I know it was the right decision.

I would love to hear from you if you have any follow up questions or if you have experienced something similar to me. I feel like to truly succeed and feel authentic as a  blogger, I need to be more transparent and I hope that this post is a step in the right direction. Thank you all for reading and following along– it means more to me than you know! xo

 


50 Comments | in Everything Else, Life

50 Responses to Coming Clean | Big Personal Update + Answering Your Questions

  1. Christiane says:

    Katie I wish you all the besteht for 2017. I am 28 and I can really relate with your experiences! Whether it be ending a friendship, getting asked the Engagement question and Finding the Wright balance between work and private life.

    I love your blog and I’ve been a follower for a long time but as you said, I was missing the personal touch this year. I’m excited for this year and I’m sure that you will be a great full time Blogger! I admire you for taking the big step oft quittimg your job. We should all learn to get rid oft everything that makes us unhappy!

    All the best,C

    • Katie says:

      Thank you so much for reading and for leaving such a kind comment, Christiane. I’m glad to hear I’m not the only who’s experienced some of what I mentioned. Holding it all in was really beginning to eat away at me and I hope I can improve on being more open in the new year. I so so appreciate your continued support! xo

  2. Limairy U says:

    Katie,

    I’m so sorry that happened to you & I hope that 2017 will be a great year for you. I’ve heard so much good and bad stories about working in PR but somehow still want it as my career. I’m hoping I won’t regret it once I graduate. I am happy you took the step in realizing that it was no longer working for you and quitting it. I had a similar situation at my job, due to a really demanding boss and a workplace full of drama. I too, found myself with anxiety and even feeling a little depressed at times. I dreaded having to go to work. One day though, I decided it was time to quit. It’s deff. good to get rid of the toxic things that make us unhappy and how amazing it feels after!

    Anyways, I want you to know that you have always been an inspiration for me even since the days of those “cringeworthy” youtube videos. Haha! 😉 I’ve been following you since then and seeing how much you’ve grown in aspects of your career & life goals makes me so proud! I loved how sweet you and Nick both were when I met you at the Joie Soho event you had a while back. You even inspired me to start my own blog a couple of years ago! 🙂

    So whenever you are feeling down think of all the people like me who you are an inspiration to without even knowing it. I will always be a loyal follower no matter what changes you make in your life because that doesn’t change who you are as a person. I wish you much success, health, love and happiness this year! 🙂

    Xo,

    Limairy

    • Katie says:

      Of course I remember meeting you, Limairy! How could I forget the event at Joie? Thank you again so much for coming to that 🙂

      In no way do I want my experience to deter anyone from pursuing a path in public relations. I’ve already begun writing a post about my story, which I hope will offer a little more clarity on just why I decided to leave my job. It’s always good to remember that everyone’s experience is different and no company is the same. Keep a lookout for it in the coming weeks!

      Your kind words mean more than you know and on days when I’m feeling down I definitely plan on coming back to this comment. THANK YOU!

  3. Nancy Nguyen says:

    Hi Katie!

    Happy New Year! I don’t comment as often as I would like to on your blog posts but I’ve enjoyed following you from your YouTube beginnings all the way to your blog now! I remember meeting you on YouTube literally years ago was it 2010? haha I can’t believe how much time has passed by but I’m so happy to hear that you are finding happiness again in your life despite some of the tough moments you experienced last year.

    Your work ethic and love for all the content that you share with us truly shines through and I can’t wait to see more content from you! You’ve inspired me and kept me going with creating my blog and youtube videos ( I totally agree with you, YouTube life has been tough and it’s so different now but will always remain near and dear to my heart as well).

    Sending positive vibes and wishing you the best of luck in 2017! You got this! 🙂

    XO,
    Nancy

    • Katie says:

      Nancy!!! Thank you so much for your sweet comment. Awww the good old YouTube days! How was that so long ago? I’m so grateful for your comment and that I’ve offered you some inspiration. There are definitely some days were I could use a little myself! Here’s to an amazing 2017 🙂

  4. Jennifer says:

    Hi Katie!

    Happy New Year! I have never commented on your blog in the past even though I have been reading for almost 4 years. I love your blog and enjoy checking it every day to see your latest post. I am so happy to hear that you are finding happiness again in your life despite some of the tough moments you experienced last year. I am a firm believer that when life gets tough its your time to shine and prove yourself. Wishing you the best of luck for 2017! You and Nick are so sweet and cute and I know you will get engaged one day and can’t wait to see it on your blog. I can wait a few more years when it is right for you two!

    XXX (hugs),
    Jennifer

    • Katie says:

      Hi Jennifer!

      Thank you so much for taking the time to leave your first comment and follow along all these years. What you mentioned could not be more true. While the year started out a little tough, it ended incredibly well and I couldn’t be more happy. Best believe that whenever we do get engaged there will be LOTS of wedding content 😛

      xo
      Katie

  5. Jenna says:

    So sorry to hear about the vandalism in your apartment! That is probably the biggest thing holding me back from hiring a cleaning service on occasion. I’m sure you felt personally attacked and its not surprising you felt a lot of anxiety from that and other issues going on. I actually would be interested to hear how the cleaning service handled the situation and restitution, its something I’ve wondered about when looking into those type of companies.

    On friendships, I had to end a close friendship last year, and I realized looking back on it that it was very one sided – I was the one usually reaching out to make plans, offer help, etc, and it wasn’t balanced. The final straw for me was being bailed on a final time during a difficult period for me, and I came to the conclusion that it no longer made sense to deal with the person and their lack of communication and effort. I do kind of feel guilty about how it ended, but I also feel a lot better without that negative relationship dragging me down. I’m a little bit older than you, and honestly, out of the friends I had in my 20s, I’ve lost touch or am not as close to about half of them. Careers, moves, relationships, life changes in general can also change a friendship. I hope you can find some peace about how your friendship ended.

    • Katie says:

      Thank you so much, Jenna! What happened to us was honestly the most bizarre, freak thing so I wouldn’t feel deterred from hiring a cleaning service. Just make sure it’s one that has been recommended to you by someone you know. It’s very hard to trust reviews online, no matter how positive they are.

      It’s so true that maintaining and finding good friendships is a lot harder when you leave school and begin working. While the situation has very heartbreaking for me at the time, it was a necessary learning experience and I’m grateful it happened when it did rather than years down the road.

  6. Carly Young says:

    Ugh you are perfect. THANK YOU for being transparent and open to your readers, letting us in on such important details of your life!

  7. Leah says:

    Katie – good for you and Nick on taking such a mature approach to your relationship, an engagement, and debt. It is such a smart choice to address student debt as quickly as possible and not to succumb to pressure of outsiders who assume you should be engaged just because of the duration of your relationship! Thanks for sharing. Personal posts are always my favorites.

    • Katie says:

      Hi Leah,

      Thank you so much for saying this! It’s hard not to get a little down when people make comments implying there must be something wrong with us for not being engaged yet, but Nick and I are both realists and take a lot of pride in how we smartly manage our finances. The time will come– just not yet 🙂

  8. Sam says:

    Kudos for having the courage to share all of this! I’m so sorry to hear about everything you went through in 2016, but it sounds like you came out on the other side stronger and happier. I think bloggers all struggle with how much of their personal lives to share and how to truly be “authentic.” It’s definitely hard to share the unfiltered and unedited version of things, but I personally think people really appreciate seeing that side of you.

    In terms of your job, I give you so much credit for realizing how unhappy it was making you and moving on. We spend so much time working that it’s really crazy to do something that we don’t enjoy, but recognizing that and acting on it isn’t always easy. I’m glad you found a new direction that makes you happy! Also, in terms of your relationship, I can tell you that when you’ve been together that long, getting engaged and married honestly doesn’t change much in your day-to-day. My husband and I met when we were 19, and were together for six years before we got married. We were still one of the first couples to get married in our friend groups. The truth is that everyone has their own timeline and there is absolutely nothing wrong with waiting until you’re more financially sound and/or established in your career. In fact, it’s really smart.

    This is a super long comment, but the overall message is yay you!! One more thing: I’m in the city too and would love to grab coffee or a drink sometime if you’re up for it 🙂

    xx
    Sam

    • Katie says:

      Hi Sam,

      Thank you thank you thank you! Comments like yours reassure me I made the right choice in sharing this post. Leaving my job was one of the hardest things I’ve ever done and at the time I felt ashamed for how I was feeling. I was very afraid if I revealed that I was unhappy in my career, I’d be viewed as a failure. I wasn’t sure if I ever was going to come clean, but now that I have I feel like I can take 2017 head on.

      PS– shoot me an email about scheduling coffee! xo

  9. Diana Pearl says:

    Love this post, Katie! First off, I feel like so many people get those engagement questions. Of course, I get it, they come when you’ve been in a relationship for a while, but at the same time, I feel like most people have similar answers. What’s the rush? Like you said, getting married is pricey and when you already live together and are “married” in nearly every sense, I don’t see the rush at all! I have friends who get the same question a lot and they’re very like ‘Um, I’m 24, calm down!’ Haha. And good for you for recognizing when your job was no longer bringing you joy and taking a hold of that. I hope 2017 has a better start to the year for you than 2016 did and brings you lots of happiness!

    • Katie says:

      So true Diana! It’s hard since because we went to school in the south and most of the couples we knew in college are already married, but in New York it’s a while different game. I don’t think I know anyone here under the age of 30 who is even engaged. I am so looking forward to planning a wedding, just when the time is right. Wishing you a wonderful 2017 as well!

  10. Ashley says:

    In many ways, this post sounds like a story of my own life… If only you knew! When you described your feeling of anxiety about going to a job you didn’t love anymore, it reminded me of why I quit my career in accounting and returned to school for a master’s degree in a different field, now to find myself an unemployed 28-year-old, looking for an entry-level job again! I also had a close friendship end and have been hounded by friends and family about when my fiancé and I will finally plan a wedding (we’ve been engaged for 3.5 years with no wedding plans in mind for similar reasons it sounds). A multitude of other things made it a really difficult year… Anyways, the point of this is that you are not alone! Thank you for being brave enough to share your struggles in such an open forum, as I’m sure many of your readers are going through similar experiences. I hope 2017 is a better year for all of us! 🙂

    • Katie says:

      Oh girl I’m so happy to hear I’m not the only one!! My goodness, if I’m grateful for anything with this blog it’s that I’ve been able to connect with so many wonderful people. Nobody’s life is perfect and it’s taken me some time to realize that it’s okay to be more open about the negative. Just the feedback I’ve gotten on this post has shown me I need to get over my fear of being personal. Sending positive vibes your way for 2017! xo

  11. Katherine says:

    Such an emotional and well written post! I’m so glad you feel better after getting everything out there – you’re a total rockstar and I have a feeling 2017 will be bringing you great things!! xxx

    • Katie says:

      Thank you Katherine!! I’ve loved keeping up with you and your sweet little fam on Instagram. If you’re ever in the city would love to catch up! xo

  12. Natalie says:

    Love this post! Not sure if you remember, but we used to work together at PRC – I still follow your blog! You have accomplished so much and have come so far – congratulations, 2017 will be the best year yet! 🙂

    xx

    • Katie says:

      OMG Natalie!!! Stop, there’s no way I’d forget about our Chipotle dates. Thank you so so so much for following and the kind words! If you’re ever back in the city we need to get together! xo

  13. Gloria says:

    You make me so very proud to know you Miss Kate. So many of us experience difficult times in our
    lives, somehow we get through them and it makes us a stronger person. You have achieved so much
    in your short life and accomplished so very much more. I know when you reach for the stars you will
    accomplish what you desire in your life. I wish for you much happiness and success and I also know
    that you are well on your path to a great career and life with your partner Nick. Here’s to the best in
    2017.

  14. Thank you so much for sharing this Katie. I was going through a similar phase at work this year too – that feeling when you get into bed feeling so anxious already about the next day and having to get through it all again… not nice. Fortunately it’s settled for me (for the most part now) and it sounds like you’re so much happier now you’ve made the decision to work for yourself so congratulations!
    I found your blog about 4 years ago and it’s one of the blogs that gave me the confidence and inspiration to start my own. I definitely love your more personal posts/ advice etc so really looking forward to a bit more of them this year!
    Lauren xx

    • Katie says:

      Isn’t it the worst feeling? I wouldn’t wish that type of anxiety on anyone. I could hardly sleep because of it! I’m glad to hear things are much better for you as they are for me. It makes me so happy that I’ve been able to give you some inspiration– thank you thank you so much for continuing to read and follow along here 🙂

  15. Rachel says:

    I can totally relate to the engagement question. My spouse and I have been together since we were 17 and we are now 28. I don’t believe in marriage so this question is especially awkward for me to answer. There are people my age who are on their second marriage and who have kids with multiple men. I just don’t see the point since it doesn’t have any significant meaning for me. Also, congrats on leaving your job! I know how much you looked forward to working in PR in college (I’ve been following you for a while) so it must’ve been so difficult walking away from what you thought would be a dream job. Would it be taboo to make a post about why you were so miserable? I’ll be honest and say I always envied you and Nick. You both seemed to be so advanced in your careers at such a young age, but success doesn’t matter if you hate your job. People would be shocked to hear that my spouse and I make around 70k collectively, but I love being a scientist and he loves installing exhibits at an art museum. More money would be nice, but I couldn’t imagine working in a cubicle all day doing something I didn’t find value in. Working for yourself must be so empowering! Okay, I’ll stop blabbering now. I hope 2017 treats you well!

    • Katie says:

      Hi Rachel,

      I recognize your email and I would like you to know that your comments on my blog and YouTube throughout the years haven’t gone unnoticed. You have always kept it real and I do genuinely appreciate when I’m given constructive criticism. THANK YOU! Being behind a computer I sometimes forget that there are people who have been following me since my college days, but if it weren’t for those like you my platform could’ve never grown to where it is today.

      I can relate to you on your marriage point. Going to school in the south, people tend to get married younger and many of our classmates are already engaged, married or having children. Nick and I also both come from divorced families and our parents married very young in their early 20s. Statistically the odds aren’t great for us, but it’s just another reason behind why we are very thoughtful with the decisions we make regarding our relationship, finances, etc.

      I’ve already begun writing a full post on why I decided to resign so stay tuned. I wouldn’t say it was necessarily because of the job itself, but more so a shift in my own mindset and what I wanted longterm. That said, I do plan on being very open and honest as I think it would be a disservice to those who are genuinely interested in the PR field to sugar coat my experience. I know I made the right decision and I couldn’t be happier.

      Wishing you the best in 2017 as well! xoxo

  16. Lynne says:

    Dearest Katie! I always enjoy your Instagram posts. Perhaps the positive spin you have has gotten you through 2016. Plus, you’ve given your fans a break from a hectic day. As for cleaning companies (we own one!): referrals, insurance (workers comp, liability and bonding) and know their products. At home, it’s my exercise and THERAPY.

    Oh yeah…I keep hearing the 80’s styles are coming back. We need you to stop this. The 80’s were not pretty or flattering and better forgotten.

    Marriage is the best! When it’s the right time for you, sounds like you have Mr. Right!

    Thank you for your 2016 insight…pretty soon you’ll be my age and laughing at last year (did I mention pulling your hair out over a teenager?). You’re a tremendous role model!

    • Katie says:

      Hi Lynne! Thank you so much for your comment and the advice re. cleaning companies. I think by going through tough experiences it’s made me appreciate the good things in my life SO much more. Looking back one year later it’s much easier to laugh about some of the crazy situations that happened. Wishing you a happy and healthy new year! xo

      • Lynne says:

        Thank you for the sweet response! You’ll be extremely successful! I know the risks, failures and tough times helped me to be in a much better place. You’ll also know your true friends. Cheers to a great weekend with lots of sweaters (yes, I love my happy color Lilly Pulitzer sweaters, too!)!!

  17. Girrrrl you and me both. 2016 wasn’t the best of years {for anybody it seems}, but here’s to a better 2017, am I right?! I love that you discussed all of this! You’re a baller — remember that.

    xx

    • Katie says:

      Grace I love you!!! I’m so grateful for your friendship and that 2016 allowed us to become closer. You are so unbelievably strong– it’s inspiring! I have a feeling 2017 is going to be a good one for both of us. xo

  18. Mallory says:

    Hi Katie,

    I’m a huge fan of your instagram and blog! Thank you for sharing your journey through 2016 and your positive outlook on 2017! It’s very difficult to be vulnerable and honest and brave online, I always admire the special people who can be! Can’t wait to see what the new year brings!

    xox

    • Katie says:

      Thank you Mallory, that means so much to me! I’m glad to hear that my honesty has been appreciated. It gives me such a hopeful outlook for 2017. Wishing you health and happiness in the new year! xo

  19. Mallory Martinez says:

    Okay, so I came to leave a comment after being moved by your post, but that^^ is basically what I wanted to say, and it’s really weird because we have the same name… ha! Anyways, thank you so much for sharing your story. I just want you to know that as a follower, it inspires so much more loyalty and connection when bloggers are real. There aren’t many out there who share other than their “highlight reel,” and I think it is causing a lot of damage to our society today. You showing the ups AND downs of life makes it so much more relatable! Thanks a ton. I’ll definitely continue to follow, and look forward to hearing about all your successes/struggles in the future!

    –The other Mallory

    • Katie says:

      Hi Mallory! It’s definitely hard as a blogger when everyone else around you seems to have the perfect life to get past the mindset of only sharing a highlight reel. I’m definitely very blessed, but it doesn’t mean I haven’t gone through similar struggles to other people. I’ve realized that being honest and sharing my truth makes me so much happier, even if it means exposing the not-so-perfect aspects of myself. Thank you so much for following along and supporting me! xo

  20. Shannon says:

    SUCH a great post! I feel like I just want to give a big hug! I hope your 2017 is filled with as much joy as possible!

    Regarding your close friendship ending, I feel like this is such a common thing that happens to women at some point in our lives, especially in our 20s as we are going through a lot of big life changes and still figuring out who we are. I also had a friendship end in the past couple years and it’s tough! It’s almost like going through a divorce or breakup, but sometimes worse. It’s really hard to break off from friendships that don’t “grow with you” and enhance your life, but life is usually happier in the long-term without that bad energy! Any tips for how to cope/handle these types of “bad-energy” friends?

    • Katie says:

      Aw thank you Shannon! I wish I could hug YOU! I’ve found that making close new friendships and retaining old ones has gotten harder and harder every year out of school. It’s so true that losing a good friend can be incredibly painful just like a breakup. I’d like to do a post on friendship at some point discussing what I’ve learned, but the best advice I can give is to not beat yourself up over the loss of a friend. Take the situation as a learning experience and apply it to better the positive relationships that do you have.

  21. Christine says:

    Hi Katie,

    whilst reading this post, I found myself nodding along. I 100% understand your thoughts and where you are coming from.

    2016 was very similar for me – I was in my first full-time job since mid-2015, and hated it. Like you, I dreaded going to work every day and there were many tears involved, as well. The worst part? I at first felt like I had to sit this one out, because other people (older generations) were telling me that everyone has to stick it up at some point and it will surely be better some time in the future… They didn’t understand how it was geniunely keeping me up at night. It took me many tears, bad moods, days I didn’t want to get out of bed until I was at a stage where I (and my other half) didn’t recognize myself anymore. The moment, when you realize, you have become someone you never wanted to be, was really an eye-opener for me. From then on, I decided that I needed to change something.

    After a couple of weeks, I found something that made my heart pound again just by reading the job search description. I knew that this was it. And I took the leap. Looking back, it was my best decision of the year. I can now geniuniely say that I like going to work. No tears, no stomach aches. But many happy thoughts.

    When I was in my old job, I really questioned, if I was just overreacting. After a couple of weeks in my new job, I realized how bad the work environment in my old job really was and how working full-time can actually feel like. Ever since, anyone who is unhappy with their job, I say: quit. It’s not worth your time, emotions or your life.

    In the same week I quit my job and signed my new job, I actually also signed the contract for my new apartment and my boyfriend and I moved together in the summer. Similar like you, we’ve been dating for almost 7 years – and we get the engagement questions regularly, as well. But we’re going the same path and while it is in the future, there are some things we want to do before we take that step.

    The Summer of 16 was a game changer for me and it turned my year around. Now, I could not be happier – in my new job, living together with my boyfriend or my life in general.

    This is getting really long, but I’m writing this to let you know: you are not alone. I think our generation struggles with norms how we “should be” or what we “should do”. My learnings from 2016: do what makes *you* happy. We’re worth it.

    I look forward to continue reading and seeing from you, Katie!

    All the best for a great 2017!

    • Katie says:

      Hi Christine,

      Thank you so much for taking the time to share your story with me. It sounds like we’ve been through very similar journeys!

      I 100% agree with what you said. I really struggled with the negative stereotypes that come along with quitting a full time job. More than ever I’ve noticed young women like myself defying societal norms when it comes to their careers– whether it’s going freelance, starting their own business, creating a new role for themselves that didn’t exist within a company or blogging full-time. It’s actually quite inspiring and it look me a while to get over my fear of what people would think about me for deciding to pump the brakes on my current career path.

      I’m happy to hear you are doing well and that your leap of faith took you in such a positive direction! I couldn’t be more glad that I took mine and would encourage everyone who is in unhappy with an aspect of their life to not be afraid to make a change. xo

  22. Kristine Somers says:

    Katie,

    You two are truly blessed and I am proud that Nick has you in his life. You both have grown up through this blog and should be admired for the hard work you both have put into it. We know the countless hours, investments, dedication, education and behind the scenes that it has taken for years to grow your brand together. I truly am thrilled for the life you live in NYC and wish you only the best with Nick. Everything will come in time, when its right for you both and not a minute too soon. ( And the crazy cleaning vandalism is a story that my grandchildren some day will just shake their heads at!!) Continued success and much happiness. You both are loved and appreciated!

  23. Mary says:

    Katie,
    I so admire you and this post! I am sure it is hard to get this all out there– I had a similar struggle of a year in 2015, and I remember how I would try to keep it together on the outside (teaching in front of 150 kids a day was a great way to get my mind off the roughest year of my life). However, writing about it can be so cathartic! I am so happy you did that! And also, you and your boyfriend are soooo cute. I was one of the last of my friends to get married, but it was all on our time! That’s what matters. I love your blog, and I am so happy to follow you!
    xxoo
    Mary

  24. KP says:

    I really love your take on life!! I have been dating my boyfriend and living together about the same time as you and I get the “when are you getting engaged” question all of the time.. It feels good to hear another person say, hey, we have student debt and are financing the wedding ourselves… we want to wait so that we can afford to do everything and have a great financial future… Keep blogging, love it!

    • Katie says:

      Thank you so much for the sweet comment! Everyone’s circumstances are different so I think it’s important to be realistic and trust your gut instincts 🙂

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